StuffedZoo Tales Glossary
Acquisitioner
Acquisitioners are StuffedZoo employees that go on exciting missions all over the planet to acquire the unique stuffed animals sold by the StuffedZoo. Karl was the first Acquistioner that Finn hired 6 years ago. V just started this year and is learning the unique skill of becoming an Acquisitioner.
Finn
Finn is the mastermind behind the unique, patent pending tools used by the StuffedZoo’s Acquisitioners. We don’t know a lot about Finn other than he dropped out of college at some point to complete the work on his invention, the “Stuffocator”. Finn is both brilliant and allusive. He likes time to perfect his tools which are based on his unique understanding of quantum physics. Finn loves the environment, his employees, animals, and physics. We believe Finn is in his mid-20’s.
Karl
Karl is the first official Acquisitioner. She is in her mid-20’s and has worked of the StuffedZoo as an Acquisitioner for the past 6 years. We don’t know a lot about Karl’s past. We do know that she is 5′2″ tall, has blond hair and blue eyes and is very athletic.
Karl is a vegetarian, we think because of her deep love for animals. She can be sarcastic but usually only for humor. She and Finn have become very close friends over the past 6 years and know each other very well. They treat each other almost like brother and sister.
Finn picked Karl specifically to be the first Acquisitioner based on some special attributes that only Finn knows. They spent the first year working together to perfect the first stuffocator.
Patrick
Patrick is a prairie dog that Karl fell in love with on a mission. He has been stuffocated several times and really enjoys the experience. Unlike the animals captured for the StuffedZoo, Patrick remembers everything about being stuffocated. He thinks of it like a roller coaster ride, only better, and always wants to be stuffocated again.
Karl has adapted many of her clothes to accommodate Patrick. She takes him with her everywhere; however, most of the time he keeps a really low profile. Patrick is crazy about Karl and would do anything for her. One well kept secret is Karl’s love of chocolate, particularly milk chocolate. Patrick sneaks her candy when they’re at the warehouse.
Parallelling
One of Finn’s quantum tricks that allows him to bend space and time to link the StuffedZoo warehouse to the point of a stuffocation. This enables the StuffedZoo to acquire the stuffed animals directly from the source of stuffocation and make them instantly available to sell.
Stuffocator
Stuffocators are the primary tool of an Acquisitioner. They are approximately 3 feet long and have a transparent ball at one end about the size of a soccer ball. Using laws of quantum physics, Finn developed a machine that transmogrifies one of natures beautiful animals into the perfect stuffed animal. He enhances the process with some special software he developed that captures the innate elements that make an animal huggable and loveable.
The stuffocator uses quantum space-time warping to populate the shelves of the StuffedZoo with animals that are stuffocated. Right at the moment that the Stuffocator figures out the perfect stuffed animal it give a forward jolt that appears to be caused by the space-time warp. Finn won’t talk about it.
Stuffocators also were developed with another technique Finn has been perfecting called self assembly. The stuffocators will do some amount of reconfiguration to match the needs of the Acquistioner.
The only person that can activate the Stuffocator is the Acquisitioner that the Stuffocator was designed for. The stuffocator uses sophisticated pattern matching of the users hands to ensure it is the Acquisitioner.
Stuffocators are designed so that they can’t harm any living creature.
V
V is a handsome guy with little known about his past…so far. He has completed his training mission and decided to become a full time acquisitioner.
V is somewhere in his twenties. His exact age is a little hard to know. He has a boyishly young face with deep eyes that penetrate his world and hint of a rich inner soul.
He signed up for his first mission primarily as a lark or escape or both. However, the stuffocation experience proved to be a very powerful motivator.
During his training mission he started to develop feelings for Karl but their relationship is complicated and inextricably linked to the fact that they both have stuffocators. Stuffocators can act like a bridge creating shared links to the universe.
View Widget
A capability that Finn added to the stuffocators that is similar to parallelling. The View Widget allows 2 stuffocators to bend space and time and open a direct viewing window near the mouth of each stuffocator.
A camera built into the stuffocator captures a 3D image of the head of the person whose hands are in the grips. The stuffocator then renders the head on the top of an avatar body that can see and be seen through the window that connects the 2 stuffocators.
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