Acquisitioners Prepare for Summer
Hi everyone, V here. Karl and I have been away from SZ most of the winter on our rainforest trip (still no sign of the hampster/seal/pig creature, but it continues to appear in my dreams, and I will not give up), and we’re here for just a few weeks before we set out again on another long summer full of stuffocating new species into the Stuffed Animal World. We have a few hopes and plans. Here are a few:
First:
Warm-weather penguins. One thing missing from our wonderful zoo is the representation of all the equatorial penguins in the world. We have Peabody the Puffin, but we need more. I want to see how the funny little birds will adapt to being in stuffed-animal form. Scientific questions like, “Will they still crave fish?” and “Will they still not be able to fly?” need to be answered. Magellanic Penguins are the ones I currently find most interesting.
Karl says the birds will be a nuisance to catch, and that they smell like raw fish. All the more reason to stuffocate them, I say!
Next:
Humboldt Squid. Karl and I disagree on this one as well. He is always so . . . so . . . so predictable. He’s so logical and uninteresting sometimes. Sigh. He says that people won’t want to cuddle with stuffed squid. I say cuddling with a stuffed squid would be marvelous! All those legs!
Besides, as long as we’re venturing in and around the ocean for penguins, we may as well get a squid or two, right?
Third:
Stuffed Kookaburra. This is Karl’s idea, and I have to say it’s a good one. These awesome, totally under-appreciated birds would be great in the SZ. Especially if we can get them to continue making their distinct “laughing” calls the way Bubo the Owl still hoots, even after being stuffed.
Birds are always difficult, though. Our stuffocator technology is really only built for land (and now sea), not for the sky. Perhaps we will have to give Dr. Parker a ring . . .
Fourth.
Last but not least on our summer goals list . . .
Stuffed Mushrooms! I am tired of eating ready-to-eat vacuum-packed trail food. Why, this entire winter trip we didn’t even have a saucepan! Well I’m not going through it any more. I want real food, and I don’t care how much more stuff we’ll have to carry with us. Maybe Karl can live on peanut butter and dried bananas, but I can’t.
*Got an idea for a new exhibit at StuffedZoo? Let the acquisitioners know in the “comments” field of this blog!*
