Why Tarantulas Make The Best Stuffed Animals - Karl:Mission 89-1
Finn was bouncing off the walls with excitement about the latest “upgrade” to the stuffocator. He wasn’t listening at all. V and I finally decide that the only way we’ll get to talk is to listen first. So for the next hour Finn drones on about a new feature of quantum mechanics he just figured out and why the stuffocators are going to be sooo much better now!
Fortunately Finn runs out of steam about the time we get to the warehouse. V and I pull our bags from the back of the car and head in out of the heat with Finn at our heels.
“I’m going to grab a shower.” V says as he heads off through the sea of racks filled with stuffed animals.
That was really nice of V. He knew I wanted some time alone with Finn.
“How did it go with V?” Finn asks before I can say anything. He has a sly grin on his face.
“Fine.” I say not yet ready to elaborate. “He’ll make a great Acquisitioner…Not as good as me, of course…” I say with a smile and let my voice trail off.
“Okay, what’s on your mind?” Finn asks. “We’ve worked together long enough for me to know you’re about to explode. It was all I could do to keep the chatter going in the car so you wouldn’t have to talk.”
“You mean that stuff about the stuffocator was just a bunch of bunk?” I ask.
“No, no it was real. I just wouldn’t have said much about it if I didn’t know you needed a little verbal break.” Finn says. “The science has gone really well the last little bit. I’m quite pleased. But let’s get back to what’s important. What’s going on in Karl’s brain?”
“I don’t know exactly where to start. Boy, when V first got off the plane I thought you had sent me a real turkey. He cleared the ladder and everyone on it in one graceful fall and threw a priceless stuffocator to the tarmac. Then he spent the entire trip to the island greener than a Granny Smith apple. I can’t tell you how unimpressed I was.
Well I finally got him to his hammock and after he crashed for quite a few hours he seemed better. I helped him get some food and watched him stabilize and recover. By the time we went for his stuffocator training he was starting to seem like a different person. By the time he saved my life and we were heading back to the hut after completing his first mission my brain hurt and my heart was very confused. I remembered what you told me about the impact of the stuffocators and that’s my problem.
Am I really in love with V or is this just some stupid stuffocator induced phenomenon that will peak and then slowly disappear? Then desperately, “Finn I’m so confused, what’s happening to me?”
Finn stood there just looking at me for a long time. Finally he says, “Karl, the stuffocator doesn’t give you feelings you don’t already have. It can heighten your awareness and your sensitivity to those feelings so…in theory, you might never pay them much attention if you 2 didn’t share the stuffocator bond.”
“I hate that! You always talk about ‘theory’. My life is NOT a theory, it’s the real thing and I want to understand!” I say practically shouting.
“Did you understand love before you started using a stuffocator?” Finn asks innocently.
“No!” I say as angry at myself as at Finn. I stay quiet for a while trying to calm down. The break in the conversation was fortunate because V came winding back from the shower.
“Boy that felt great!” he says with passionate enthusiasm. “What have you 2 been up to?”
Finn turned to V and said, “We’ve been talking about Karl’s next mission. She’s going after a very special creature…a rare tarantula we’ve been needing at the StuffedZoo.”
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